TV In Prosonian Land

In reply to Mrs. Grazner in Fargo,North Dakota, yes, the Prosonians do have television. Oddly enough, they call television VAEA, and they have had it for almost seventy years.

They originally had small sets, similar to ours, and in its infancy had very poor quality sets, all black and white, and their first sets had no sound, only a picture. Radio, as we know it, was not discovered until a few years ago. They went by the theory that "a picture is worth a thousand words," and they adhered to that until recently feeling that splurt had no value.

You must realize that Prosonians are merely perceptions, they are how "we" perceive them to be, so visual communication was  much more important than any audio, or splurt, as they refer to audible communications. For many years Prosonians had VAEA's with no splurt.

A few years ago, the Parama contracted a consulting firm to study VAEA and the affect it was having on the populace. They spent many hours, around the clock, viewing and analyzing VAEA, or television as you call it. After much serious viewing and thought and analyzing, they submitted their report to the Parama, who presented it to the assembled group to evaluate its worth.

All of the various networks were given 30 days to remove all transmission from the airways. So now, Prosonians can only listen to the splurt with no picture, a blank screen, their thinking, VAEA offered no cultural, informational or entertainment value, so a blank screen would suffice.

One alert advertising mogul, who owns "As Seen On VAEA,"  immediately put  together a package of pictures of their clients various products which could be purchased for $19.95 plus S & H, two sets for only the additional S & H if ordered promptly. These pictures, through magnatropulation adhere to the pictureless set and can be changed at the discretion of the owner. Some viewers who had young children purchased sets with letters and numbers that could be used as an educational tool.

One long time elderly viewer was asked if he missed viewing live pictures and and his regular shows on his VAEA, to which he replied, "Why, what do you mean, they aren't on anymore?"

Pictured above is a revolutionary concept introduced recently at a trade show at the Prosonian Hilton in Las Norga, a combination stereo and blank double screen for additional non viewing.

Interest in the Prosonians

I have been inundated with requests from readers, all over the world, inquiring how I first heard of the Prosonians and how I became acquainted with their country and their customs.

I was requested a few years ago, to investigate a situation in Tennesee, involving a piece of land owned by a Squire Young. Strange things were apparently happening there and some of the nearby citizens were concerned. Further investigating unfolded the fact that the piece of land consisted of a one inch square of  soil. I knew then that in order for a large number of people to live on that small an estate required them to be quite small, and that is how they wanted to be perceived, they were merely perceptions. Some took on normal sizes and still live among us.

They were originally a conventional sized people living in California, were troubled by the economy there, through transcendental meditation combined with some scientific religious teachings they encountered in California, they enabled the entire population to become "perceptions," they could be whatever they wanted to be.

Since they lived in this country, they wanted to be perceived as we were, and returned to their homeland many years ago, but maintained a presence in the Tennesee hills.

They lived there in peace and harmony until Osan became their Pleban, or Head of Government, and his diabolical plan to take over the country unfolded. Many left their homeland and are back living on the estate of Squire Young in Tennesee.

It is difficult to detect a Prosonian. First, they are gullible, they believe what they are told, that is what led to their downfall. Second, they are easily disillusioned, they believe what they hear, they are veiled, they cannot always see the truth. They may think NO, but they hear someone say YES, so they listen. They have a tendency to have their personal rights eroded, and when they realize it, it  can be too  late for them. They expect others to take care of them and lead them. As I say, there are many among us now.

A recent Prosonian post intercepted by the glorn

Super Bowl Sunday was big in our country, it was also a big day in Prosonia

The most popular sport in Prosonia is Gloc, it is played everywhere, by children, in schools, colleges and for many years, a larnso was formed, and some of the major zons subsidized them, and they had a Gloc Match every seventh darth. The last meeting of the two top Glocs was held two weeks after their last meeting, and it was great thing for the group of players who emerged victorious. It was a big day in the land. All work stopped, and many met at the stader to view the proceedings. Elaborate ceremonies were held before, during and after the event. Many events that had nothing to do with Gloc were held, thinking that those viewing the proceedings on their ravo would be enthralled by all of the activity.

There were eleven Prosonians on each Gloc group, as they called them, and the object was to move an egg shaped rock, or Zanto, as it was called,  from one end of an open area to another. It could only be moved by creating an intelligent thought. The group that had possession of the Zanto would line up facing the other group, and then thoughts would be exchanged. Then the mediator, as he was called, would determine the quality of the thought, and then he would move the zanto an appropriate amount. Intelligence was the major asset to a successful Gloc. I was told that this was in direct contrast to our game of football, which was generally decided by physical prowess.

Over the years, those who spent their trostys on messages to distribute their products became the main focus of the day and it eventually evolved into a day to make the Prosonians happy, rather than to watch the zanto. A Garther was written by the Pleban which made the day a Prosonian Holiday, and the zanto was forgotten. It became just another  three day holiday.

All of those who participated in the zanto programs eventually went to work in the ravo industry. Many had suffered head trauma from all of the intelligent thoughts they had to arrive at while participating.

Prosonians always suggested that their ravo, or telvision, was equal to or superior to ours. Their ravos only had blank screens, and they often felt that their blank screen was at least equivalent to our visible TV, if not better. The Prosonians used their imaginations while watching the blank screen.

I pass on this information as it is presented to me.